Showing posts with label Travel Advice. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Travel Advice. Show all posts

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Why do Airlines discriminate against normal sized and skinny people with a single suitcase?


All airlines operate a cargo service in one form or another. 

For decades they have charged air-freight customers on a combination of the greater of the actual weight versus the size. 

A big box of feathers would be charged on the size and not the actual weight. 

An infinitely fair and universal rating policy, no one sees as being ‘unjust’.    

So why therefore should a 90 kilogram person be charged the same as a 150kg person when it comes to an identical passenger seat?   

Why is the total kilo count of the baggage also never factored in?  

Due to wooly-wofter airlines being so ‘politically correct’ they are afraid to instigate what is an infinitely and fair system of rating passengers the same as an air-freight consignment. 

Passenger + Baggage = Total Kilos   

Go over a threshold of say 135kgs and you are charged extra.  

On my last flight I was 90kgs total (comprising 85 + 5 ) and I consider myself to be of average build.  

I am being more than generous with a threshold of 135kgs being 45kgs (approx. 100lbs) more than what I ‘carry’ on a flight.   

It’s hard to argue that currently normal sized and skinny customers, those that pack practically aren't subsidising other passengers given aviation fuel is the airlines largest cost.  

I for one would support the first airline that instigated a fair passenger rating schedule.  

The first major airline to announce a fair rating system would make a killing, spell disaster for fatty/packy friendly airlines as their most profitable clients went off to the new guys and they were left with the dross, having to be re-fuelled in-air to get to their destination.     

Fatties and over-packers could moan “We won’t be using ‘that’ airline” but they invariably would be faced with higher fares that reflected the extra fuel they burn now they weren’t getting subsidised by other passengers.   

Normal travellers would enjoy cheaper fares, not have to put up with obese seat-mates for 13 hours and be able to put their bags in a locker not stuffed to the gunnels with suitcases.         

All in all I’m sick of being discriminated against. 

Legions of fatties and over-packers deliberately being ignored at check-in counters least airlines up-set them.  
 
Passengers being permitted suitcases bigger than my own as 'carry-on'.

I would also like to those passengers that are so obese they ‘spill’ into other seats automatically pay for two seats. No exceptions. No pissing around pandering to them.
 
 
 

Monday, September 23, 2013

Cruise Ships are destroying The Mediterranean


The new fleet of monstrous live sheeple carriers (a.k.a Cruise Ships) are little more than plague boats that infect every port they park their and their clients fat arses in.  

For example the Mediterranean port township of Mykonos, permanent population of the beautiful port township itself, approx. 3,000.   

The township can’t cope with a sudden influx of 3,000 waddling tourists, on-shore for a few hours to buy a tea towel, take the same mandatory photos as everyone else then go back on-board for another round of pink-gins and nightly bingo.   

The share numbers of sheeple mean what is essentially a fishing village is inundated, its famous alleyways clogged.     

The intrinsic nature of the place, its beauty is destroyed under the weight of numbers.  

Where-ever cruise lines go they scorch the earth for other tourists. 

Bloated locusts stripping the place of 'it's goodness' and leaving to do the same at another once pristine location on their route.

Cruise ships as I have mentioned are little more than ‘plague ships’ and their numbers/volume of people need to be restricted.

People like me are already avoiding any destination they destroy on a daily basis.     

My advice when preparing an overseas holiday is to avoid any place on the cruise-ship map.

Go inland away from the sheeple who after-all only have a maximum waddling range of 500 metres from any given drop-off point.     

Look at the losers, girths and tacky dressers in this self-incriminating video fucking it up for everyone.
 
 

Thursday, May 16, 2013

10 REASONS WHY CRUISE SHIP TRAVEL SUCKS!

 

One: Baa baa I don’t want to be treated like a two-legged fucking sheep and herded every-where like kids on their first day at school.   

Two: I want to get away from people when I travel, relax on my own in a place of my choosing where, if I so desire, I can stay or leave.  Your average ship cabin resembles a prison cells only smaller and endless ocean out of the port-hole as opposed to striped-sunlight. 

Three: Which-ever way you look at it a boat is simply a floating hotel. Who the hell wants to spend most of their holiday in a hotel? A hotel where the predominate view outside is water and the occasional seagull.   

Four: When you travel overseas surely you want to meet the locals not sit next door to a couple from the same town over another ghastly smorgasbord? What is the point in visiting a country and not embracing their culture, food in preference to ‘retreating’ every night to your English speaking cosy version of Red Lobster combined with the The Hilton? A tacky floating Las Vegas.      

Five: The lack of adventure. I enjoy exploring places, going into seedy bars, listening to a local  band, going to a remote beach with two dogs as company, watching sport in a pub with locals. Meanwhile on the cruise ship they are running bingo and the elderly lady from cabin 2187 has had an angina attack and is in the infirmary.  The only real excitement on-board is the prospect of some-one jumping over the side, only you'll be tucked-up in bed since it's 9 o'clock and miss all the 'excitement'.   

Six: You only get to visit ports. Lyttelton (Christchurch) is definitely not indicative of Canterbury and the South Island as a whole. Think of the closest port to you. Is that the best place to recommend to a tourist?    

Seven: They fuck up pristine coastal town for other travellers. A huge behemoth vessel pulls up to port and deposits large numbers of waddling sloth-like tourists, some vessels carry 5,000 plus, into a small village thus destroying its integrity for everyone. The town is swamped and on-shore all you meet are the people you had breakfast with.    

Eight: Old people, let’s be brutally honest you’ll be stuck in an environment with thousands of people who are either physically challenged or adopted a mentally old, lazy attitude to travel. No one who is remotely interesting goes on a cruise.    

Nine: When you ‘visited’ a place you never really ‘visited’ it in the truest sense.  How can anyone see say the island of Santorini for half a day and truly say they experienced the island after buying a tea-towel. It’s like transferring at Dubai Airport and saying you’ve been there.   

Ten: Americans. Who wants to be stuck in a confined space with the world’s worst, rudest predominant cruise-ship travellers?