Persistent complaints from Christian wowsers, have lead Dominion Breweries (the owners of beer brand Tui’s) to pull-down their latest creation.
“This Christmas take a moment to think about Christ”.
For those of you reading this article from overseas, the cheeky & topical Tui’s billboards, are prominent institutions around New Zealand cities.
Online competitions are run by Tui’s to find the next ‘Yeah Right’ slogan.
Tui Spokeswoman Hailey Bloore said the aim of their ‘This Christmas take a moment to think about Christ’ billboard was to draw attention to the commercialism of Christmas, and they had never intended to offend anyone.
But we all know how thin-skinned Christians can be, & poking fun at invisible supernatural beings, is a subject matter even humourists dare not mention, without facing the inevitable vitriol.
In Hamilton, this humour and irony was lost on Father Frank Eggleton, parish priest at the Cathedral of the Blessed Virgin Mary, who labelled the billboard "appalling" and said it demeaned the holiness and meaning of Christmas (something about the shortest day in the northern hemisphere if I’m correct?)
Bloore, and the brewery attempted to explain to complainants - the billboards were never intended to take a stab at religion.
These attempts however did little to placate the righteous busy-bodies, so in the end the flood of complaints, including some to The Advertising Standards Authority, lead to their demise.
The controversial Christchurch board was replaced with one which said "It's OK, we were under the mistletoe."
In Auckland went-up “Chicks don’t fart” instead.
And in Hamilton, which proved itself to be a bastion of Christian sensibility: "Grandma has a real knack for buying Christmas presents”.
But, these boards are fairly tame replacements & pander to po-faced God botherers, who forced a major New Zealand business to abandon the principals of freedom of speech and ‘in your face’ Kiwi satire.
So in the spirit of the season, the Northern Winter Solstice, I’ve created my own Christian/Theist themed ‘Yeah Right’ billboards,
My personal two-fingered salute, to those who try to impose their own beliefs on a public, who have grown to love this, unfretted Kiwi institution.
And don’t be shy - put your own contributions in the comments section.I know you want to.
This earth, our home, is a small blue-green planet, orbiting a minor star on one arm of a galaxy called the Milky Way. A galaxy is composed of gas, dust and many millions of stars and there are some hundred thousand galaxies in the known Universe.
It is now believed that, at a certain time in the past, which can be calculated as roughly 14 Billion years ago, all the matter and energy in the Universe was concentrated in a mathematical point with zero volume from which it burst out in one 'Big Bang' to create the Universe.
After the Big Bang the Universe began to cool and clouds of gas collapsed under the pull of their own gravity, to form starts. About 4500 million years ago the Earth condensed out of the gas and dust swirling around our star, the sun.
Fossil records show that the first signs of life appeared soon after - about 4000 million years ago.
Over millions of years, different forms of life have evolved; some species existed briefly then died out, others became extinct after millions of years.
This is a brief synopsis of what we know of how the universe & earth was formed.
So which religion is it that has a story which most closely resembles the known scientific facts about the creation of the earth & mankind?
Which belief system has the most accurate cosmological myth?
Contrastingly which religion, has a story which least resembles the true formation of the earth, space and all living things?
The results are surprising.
Here’s the score-card, I’ll be teacher and mark the credibility of each in points out of 10 (denoted in red).
As briefly as I can make them……….
AUSTRALIAN ABORIGINALS: In the beginning the earth was a bare plain. All was dark. There was no life, no death. The sun, the moon, and the stars slept beneath the earth. All the eternal ancestors slept there, too, until at last they woke themselves out of their own eternity and broke through to the surface. When the eternal ancestors arose, in the Dreamtime, they wandered the earth, sometimes in animal form -- as kangaroos, or emus, or lizards -- sometimes in human shape, sometimes part animal and human, sometimes as part human and plant. Two such beings, self-created out of nothing, were the Ungambikula. Wandering the world, they found half-made human beings. They were made of animals and plants, but were shapeless bundles, lying higgledy-piggledy, near where water holes and salt lakes could be created. The people were all doubled over into balls, vague and unfinished, without limbs or features. With their great stone knives, the Ungambikula carved heads, bodies, legs, and arms out of the bundles. They made the faces, and the hands and feet. At last the human beings were finished. Thus every man and woman was transformed from nature and owes allegiance to the totem of the animal or the plant that made the bundle they were created from -- such as the plum tree, the grass seed, the large and small lizards, the parakeet, or the rat. This work done, the ancestors went back to sleep. Some of them returned to underground homes, others became rocks and trees. The trails the ancestors walked in the Dreamtime are holy trails. Everywhere the ancestors went, they left sacred traces of their presence -- a rock, a waterhole, a tree. For the Dreamtime does not merely lie in the distant past, the Dreamtime is the eternal Now. Between heartbeat and heartbeat, the Dreamtime can come again.
I tried my best to be charitable, but exercise requires some objectivity and this story is exactly that, a story, and a poor one at that. I did however like the concept of a dream-time, so that factor alone meant they got half a point [ 1.5 ]
BUDDHIST: The Buddhist view is that everything emanates from the Primordial expanse of Openness Clarity Sensitivity and is illusion like- never really coming into existence, but the illusion is created by infinite intricate connections that are not anywhere and not in time. Time and space are part of the illusion that is emanating from that Primordial expanse - so it is all very mysterious. From the Buddhist perspective there is no problem with life on earth having evolved somehow - but evolution is not in itself a full story or full account of life on earth.
It’s a bit vague I have to say, but the mere mention of ‘primordial’ is an attention grabber. ‘Time’ and ‘space’ are also sure winners & bound to get a tick. [4.0]
CHRISTIANITY:In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. The earth was without form and void, and darkness was upon the face of the deep; and the Spirit of God was moving over the face of the waters. And God said, "Let there be light"; and there was light. And God saw that the light was good; and God separated the light from the darkness. God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And there was evening and there was morning, one day. And God said, "Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it separate the waters from the waters." And God made the firmament and separated the waters which were under the firmament from the waters which were above the firmament. And it was so. And God called the firmament Heaven. And there was evening and there was morning, a 2nd day. And God said, "Let the waters under the heavens be gathered together into one place, and let the dry land appear." And it was so. God called the dry land Earth, and the waters that were gathered together he called Seas. And God saw that it was good. And God said, "Let the earth put forth vegetation, plants yielding seed, and fruit trees bearing fruit in which is their seed, each according to its kind, upon the earth." And it was so. The earth brought forth vegetation, plants yielding seed according to their own kinds, and trees bearing fruit in which is their seed, each according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. And there was evening and there was morning, a 3rd day. And God said, "Let there be lights in the firmament of the heavens to separate the day from the night; and let them be for signs and for seasons and for days and years, and let them be lights in the firmament of the heavens to give light upon the earth." And it was so. And God made the 2 great lights, the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night; he made the stars also. And God set them in the firmament of the heavens to give light upon the earth, to rule over the day and over the night, and to separate the light from the darkness. And God saw that it was good. And there was evening and there was morning, a 4th day. And God said, "Let the waters bring forth swarms of living creatures, and let birds fly above the earth across the firmament of the heavens. So God created the great sea monsters and every living creature that moves, with which the waters swarm, according to their kinds, and every winged bird according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. And God blessed them, saying, "Be fruitful and multiply and fill the waters in the seas, and let birds multiply on the earth." And there was evening and there was morning, a 5th day. And God said, "Let the earth bring forth living creatures according to their kinds; cattle and creeping things and beasts of the earth according to their kinds." And it was so. And God made the beasts of the earth according to their kinds and the cattle according to their kinds, and everything that creeps upon the ground according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, after our likeness; and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps upon the earth." So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. And God blessed them, and God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it; and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the air and over every living thing that moves upon the earth." And God said, "Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed which is upon the face of all the earth, and every tree with seed in its fruit; you shall have them for food. And to every beast of the earth, and to every bird of the air, and to everything that creeps on the earth, everything that has the breath of life, I have given every green plant for food." And it was so. And God saw everything that he had made, and behold, it was very good. And there was evening and there was morning, a 6th day. Thus the heavens and the earth were finished, and all the host of them. And on the 7th day God finished his work which he had done, and he rested on the 7th day from all his work which he had done. So God blessed the 7th day and hallowed it, because on it God rested from all his work which he had done in creation.
Phew, the writers of The Bible went into a lot of detail, more it has to be said to other major religions, but quantity is not what we are after here – it’s quality. It’s all about God, this God that, short on scientific substance, and factually way off the mark. [Mark of 2.5, for effort alone]
CHINESE TAOISM: In the beginning of time, there was only chaos. The elements and gases of the heavens and earth freely mingled, and the organizing principle was dormant. It lay dormant somewhere inside this elemental cosmos, awaiting the right moment to begin the transformation. The shape of this primeval mass was something like an egg. For 18,000 years the universe remained in this state, until the incubation was finally complete, and the egg hatched. Then the heavens and the earth came into existence. The lighter, most pure substances floated upward and became the heavens. These elements were named yang. The heavier, more impure substances descended and became the earth. These were named yin. From the same forces, a third, the giant Pan Ku, was born as well. As he grew, his sheer size divided the heavens and the earth. The giant lived for another 18,000 years. With the assistance of four creatures, a tortoise, a phoenix, a dragon, and a unicorn, he labored daily to mold the earth. Together they created the world as we know it today.When Pan Ku finally died, his body was transformed. His left eye became the sun and his right eye became the moon. His blood became the rivers and oceans, his breath became the wind, his sweat became the rain, and his voice became the thunder. His flesh became the soil, and from the fleas living on his body, the human race sprang into being. In this way, the stage was set for the pageant of history to unfold.
Cosmos, transformation – this is more like it fellas. One an almost forget the rubbish about Pan Ku, right eye and the 18,000 business when you finally get supplied detail which means something to house-dweller as opposed to a cave-dweller [ Mark of 4 ]
HINDU: Before this time began, there was no heaven, no earth and no space between. A vast dark ocean washed upon the shores of nothingness and licked the edges of the night. A giant cobra floated on the waters. Asleep within its endless coils lay the Lord Vishnu. He was watched over by the mighty serpent. Everything was so peaceful and silent that Vishnu slept undisturbed by dreams or motion. From the depths a humming sound began to tremble, Aum. It grew and spread, filling the emptiness and throbbing with energy. The night had ended, Vishnu awoke. As the dawn began to break, from Vishnu’s navel grew a magnificent lotus flower. In the middle of the blossom sat Vishnu’s servant, Brahma. He awaited the Lord’s command. Vishnu spoke to his servant: ‘It is time to begin.’ Brahma bowed. Vishnu commanded: ‘Create the World.’ A wind swept up the waters. Vishnu and the serpent vanished. Brahma remained in the lotus flower, floating and tossing on the sea. He lifted up his arms and calmed the wind and the ocean. Then Brahma split the lotus flower into three. He stretched one part into the heavens. He made another part into the earth. With the third part of the flower he created the skies. The earth was bare. Brahma set to work. He created grass, flowers, trees and plants of all kinds. To these he gave feeling. Next he created the animals and the insects to live on the land. He made birds to fly in the air and many fish to swim in the sea. To all these creatures, he gave the senses of touch and smell. He gave them power to see, hear and move. The world was soon bristling with life and the air was filled with the sounds of Brahma’s creation.
I’m giving this a mark of three [ 3.0] based on the mention of a single significant marker – ‘energy’. Had ‘the vast ocean’ bit been expanded on I would have given it an extra half. Better than average.
MUSLIM/ISLAMIC: In the time before time, God was. And when God wants to create something, all he needs to say is "Be", and it becomes. So it was that God created the world and the heavens. He made all the creatures, which walk, swim. Crawl and fly on the face of the earth. He made the angels, and the sun, moon and the stars to dwell in the universe. And consider, as the Qur'an says, how God poured down the rain in torrents, and broke up the soil to bring forth the corm, the grapes and other vegetation; the olive and the palm, the fruit trees and the grass. Then it was that God ordered the angels to go to the earth, and to bring seven handfuls of soil, all of different colours, from which he could model man. God took the seven kinds of earth and moulded them into a model of a man. He breathed life and power into it, and it immediately sprang to life. And this first man was called Adam. God took Adam to live in Paradise. In Paradise, God created Eve, the first woman, from out of Adam's side. God taught Adam the names of all the creatures, and then commanded the angel to bow down before Adam. But Iblis, one amongst the angels, refused to do this, and thus began to disobey God's will. God place the couple in a beautiful garden in Paradise, telling them that they could eat whatever they wanted except the fruit of on forbidden tree, But the evil one tempted them to disobey God, and eat the fruit. When God knew that Adam and Eve had disobeyed him, he cast them out of Paradise and sent them to earth. But God is merciful. The earth was created to give food, drink and shelter to the human race. The sun, moon and stars give light. It is a good world, where everything has been created to serve people. And people, the Qur'an teaches, should serve God.
For the 2nd largest religion the authors of the Qur’an didn’t spend a hell of a lot of time writing on creation, so they are appropriately marked-down. Much like their major theist rivals, nothing here ties-in with what we know to be fact. [ 2.0 Poor effort all round, can do better]
NEW ZEALAND MAORI: Heaven and earth were once joined as Ranginua, the Sky Father and Papatuanuku, the Earth Mother, lay together in a tight embrace. They had many children who lived in the darkness between them. These children grew and discussed amongst themselves what it would be like to live in the light. Tu-matauenga, the fiercest of the children said: 'Let us kill our parents and then we can live always in light.' In Polynesian mythology (specifically: Maori), Rangi is the sky father, wife of the Earth Mother, Papa. ... The Earth Mother is a motif that appears in many mythologies. ... But Tane Mahuta his brother disagreed: 'No, there is no need to kill them, we can just push them apart, then our Father the Sky can be above us to watch over us and our Mother can be below to nurture us.' All the other children agreed to this except Tawhiri-matea, the Son who was in charge of Storm and Wind; he was sad at the idea that the parents would be torn apart.The others put their plans into action: Rongo-ma-tane, the god of cultivated crops and food tried to push his parents apart, then Tangaroa the god of the sea and his sibling Haumia-tikitiki, the god of food which grows without being cultivated, joined him. In spite of their joint efforts, Rangi and Papa remained close together in a loving embrace. In Polynesian mythology (specifically: Samoa), Tangaroa (or Tagaloa) is the sea god, a son of Rangi and Papa, whom he forcibly separated from each other. ...Finally, Tane Mahuta, the god of forests and insects tried, but instead of standing upright and pushing with his hands as his brothers had done, he lay on his back and pushed with strong feet. Stretching every sinew, Tane pushed and pushed until with cries of grief and surprise, Ranginui and Papatuanuku were prised apart. Tawhiri-matea could not bear to hear the cries of his parents, nor see the tears of the Sky Father at the parting, so he created great storms and winds and promised his siblings that from henceforth, they would have to contend with his wrath. He joined his father in the sky from where he periodically punishes the earth and sea with his violent storms.Rangi and Papa continue to grieve for each other to this day. Rangi's tears fall towards Papatuanuku to show how much he loves her. Sometimes Papatuanuku heaves and strains and almost breaks herself apart to reach her beloved partner again but it is to no avail.When mist rises from the forests, these are Papa's sighs as the warmth of her body yearns for him and continues to nurture mankind.
I’ve read this a few times, attempted ‘to pick the bones’ and come –up empty handed. [ 1.5 ]
So there you have it.
It’s a photo finish between Taoism and Buddhism.
The rest of the field is left trailing well behind.
Overall though, it’s a fairly easy exercise to discredit all these religious creation myths en masse. Vagueness & ambiguity are the universal threads of creationist stories, and deities of many colours invariably get all the credit for ‘life the universe and everything’. Credit is given where, it is not due.
It’s easy to see there are also no indication, the authors of these stories had any grasp of the sciences (biology, physics, geology, cosmology etc) necessary to ascertain the true origins.
Although few & far between, any similarities between the true origins of how the universe, Earth, mankind etc came into being, and religious myths – must be put down to share coincidence.
Luke Lee (a.k.a Yong Bum Lee) arrived in New Zealand from Korea in 1994, leaving behind his wife and children, and a chequered business career back in Seoul.
He was able to gain entry into New Zealand on a student visa, studying at the Assemblies of God Advanced Ministry of Training Centre in Auckland.
It was at the Assemblies of God Training Centre he meet and married, Korean New Zealander Joyce Lee in 1996.
After completing his training Lee headed to London for six months, and then returned to Korea where he faced an historic conviction for fraud, and was imprisoned for a year.
It was in his prison cell that ‘God spoke to him’ and upon his release he obeyed the voices in his head, which called him to return to New Zealand, specifically Mt Roskill.
Now an Assemblies of God pastor he founded the Lord of All Church, which attracted a meager & motley following , comprising mostly Koreans, and a number of homeless gathered-up from down-town Auckland streets.
The Assemblies of God were evidently not picky who they ordained, and the petty criminal Lee’s idiosyncratic and delusional behaviour were interpreted by those from the church who monitored probationary pastors as being merely ‘over zealous’.
Originally Lee was assisted by another pastor, Michael Hamilton, but he left Lord of All in January 2000, and reported his concerns to Church hierarchy, including importantly Lee’s propensity for over-vigorous physical intervention.
One of these members of his church was the quite and introverted 37-year old Joanna Lee (no relation to Lee and also known as Keum Ok Lee ) A loner with no known relatives, Joanna had known Lee and had belonged to a similar Christian cult back in Korea.
Exorcisms were a regular activity at Lord of All Ministry, which ran from Luke Lees suburban Auckland home. At one stage Lee and his band of followers, performed them in the Diocesan School for Girls' hall where the church meetings were originally held.
These exorcisms were noisy and prolonged affairs, which became the bane of Lees neighbours. Lee’s favourite instrument, a whistle, served the dual purposes of organising his group like sheep-dogs and confronting demons. A strange dualism.
On the night of Saturday 9th December 2000, just six weeks after she joined the church, Pastor Luke Lee undertook the exorcism of Joanne Lee on his lounge floor. Pastor Lee Luke later claimed Joanna was inhabited by 20 demons (or ‘evil ghosts’) and failure to excommunicate the demons would have resulted in her ultimate demise. It was clear to others in the church Joanna was infatuated with the pastor and she may have seen this process as a way to become closer to him and for him to return her adoration.
In keeping with previous exorcisms members beat drums, blew horns, and chanted incantations around Joanna Lee as she lay on a mattress on the floor. Pastor Lee also had it in his head, that demons resided in a victim’s stomach, and the best way to chase them out was the ‘direct route’ – that’s to say jumping on the subject’s stomach.
After Lee had sat-on, jumped-on, thumped Joanna’s prone torso he then changed tacks and decided the demons had migrated upwards to Joanna’s throat. His method to dislodging the pesky demon was again the most direct & ‘hands-on’ – strangulation.
At this point of the exorcism Joanna realised she was fighting for her life. But rather than ceasing proceedings, her survival struggles and yells of “no,no,no” were interpreted by Lee and his followers as demonic utterances. They held her writhing body down instead.
Shortly after, Joanna, blood running from her mouth, ceased breathing.
An autopsy showed she had died of strangulation as well as suffering an broken sternum , broken ribs and multiple internal injuries.
Joanna’s lack of vital-signs seems to have escaped Pastor Lee and his followers.
Now late at night Lee himself trotted up-stairs to bed with his wife, others who were present went off home and some dosed-down in the lounge.
In the morning they were all back in Pastors Lee’s lounge for the normal Sunday Service, along with the corpse of Joanna Lee.
As morbid as it sounds Pastor Lee and the followers carried on as if nothing untoward had occurred, intermittingly praying for Joanna Lees resurrection. For five days the members of The Lord of All Church danced, quoted from the bible and blew into the deceased mouth, awaiting her return from the dead.
On the 6th day members said they saw the fingers on her blackening, decomposing body move and her skin lighten (in reality what they were observing was her outer skin was peeling off)
Believing a momentous miracle was occurring in his flat, Pastor Lee then started to video proceedings so the world would have the evidence of Amanda Lee’s resurrection.
Lee also wanted a neutral witness to this resurrection so a sympathetic neighbour, Edwin Muir, was summoned to his flat to represent the rest of humanity, outside the two dozen members of his church.
Instead of starring in wonder at the miracle taking place on Lee’s lounge-floor, having smelt the stench & viewed the fly-blown body, a horrified Muir quickly left the flat and phoned the police.
Police arrived at Maryland Drive address on December 15th and were told by Lee that Joanna Lee had been sick and was sleeping. Despite the obvious state of the body by this stage (remember this was summer) the pastor insisted police had made a mistake in thinking she was dead."You must give us the opportunity to pray for Joanna," not for the first time Lee told police, or anyone else in hearing range.
"We are innocent. God knows. If we pray, Joanna will come back. God knows."
Pastor Lee was arrested and charged with Joanna Lee’s man-slaughter.
At Lee’s trial he insisted on representing himself on the basis that ‘God had told him’ and his belief that Joanna would come back to life anyway, and he would be vindicated.
Outside of the Auckland court room Lee’s profound repeated announcements, to enthralled media that the deceased would rise from the dead became the topic of many work lunch-rooms chats and the butt of pub jokes.
The only defense he offered at his closing trial was his ‘rambling’ tear-filled closing statement where again he repeated claims Joanna would rise from the dead, even offering the jury a time and date - midnight on the evening of Sunday 9 December 2001.
Needless to say, the prophetic date passed without a beep from Joanna Lee, little wonder since she had been cremated 12 months earlier.
By now the once staunch membership of The Lord of All church all but deserted ‘the great leader’ and at his sentencing (6 years for manslaughter) the only ones at his side were his wife and daughter.
After hearing the harrowing evidence the judge excused the jurors from service for another three years. Part of the evidence was the horrific video taken of the proceedings.
"The particular concern I have Mr Lee, is that your charisma and the cult-like sway you hold on your followers, suggest that when you are released from prison, you will continue to be a risk to the public," said High Court Judge Justice Paterson.
In jail for the second time & now with legal representation Lee appealed his sentence, citing the freedom of religion & Joanna’s right to consent to the exorcism.
Lee’s appeal case argued consenting to an exorcism was no different than getting cosmetic surgery - the patient must weigh the risks up and measure them against the outcome.
As suprising as it sounds The New Zealand Court of Appeal (2005) accepted his councils arguments, that Joanna Lee has been aware of the dangers involved in the proceedings that lead to her untimely death, having been present at prior exorcisms held by Lee.
A re-trial was ordered but the time of this successful appeal, Lee had been released early from his sentence & was returned to Korea.
Not only was Lees deportation an obstacle for a re-trial, there was also the logistical issues for Police Prosecutors locating the witness’s and members of his church, virtually all of whom had returned to Korea as well.
By no means is this fatal exorcism an apparition.
This case is but the third of four publicised fatal exorcisms, that have occurred in New Zealand in the last 25 years.
Have you ever asked yourself, why the hell do we celebrate the Northern Winter Solstice in New Zealand?
Along with Guy Fawkes, New Zealand’s inherited annual celebration of The Winter Solstice on the 25th December, has to be one of the more absurd ‘holiday’ observances going.
Who in New Zealand gives a ‘rats arse’ that this date heralds the onset of winter in the northern hemisphere, when down-under we are basking in sunshine, donning shorts, and lazing on beaches?
And if the Christians wanted to pinch this date from the pagans and call it their own – why should we follow suit and act like that this date is any more relevant than say the 25th of August or the 07th February?
Pick a date, any date for the birth of Christ, they all have the same basis in fact.
That’s to say…..none.
It’s not yours, or my fault, no one bothered to put crucial information like dates of births in The Bible and the ‘desperate & dateless’ Catholic Church said “this Winter Solstice will do the trick” ten plus centuries ago.
This plagiarism of holiday observance dates may have some historic validity in say England, where winter falls at this time and where folks got naked & worshipped the sun (prior to do-gooders spoiling their fun) but the date has no credence in New Zealand.
Christmas, is New Zealand’s cultural equivalent of a legacy from a dead distant uncle, who liked wearing brown-suits & grey shoes, and expects you to now don them.
Hey, don’t get me wrong I totally support the principal of New Zealanders taking time off from work, drinking to excess, connecting with friends and family, venerating the deity of their choice (as long as it’s away from me), exchanging crappy gifts, adding to the countries obesity epidemic – but on the date of Winter Solstice when its’ 25 degrees Celsius outside?
Get outta here!
Then there’s the issue of Christians who conveniently ignore those ‘gapping blanks’ in their most precious book, and want the rest of us to go along with their historic pantomime and pretend, like they do, that Christ was born on this date – when he wasn’t!
These are the very same group of zealots that want us to be fine up-standing & honest citizens – but when it suits their own purposes they ‘never let the facts get in the way of a good story’.
If we are going to continue celebrating sacred pagan holidays - why stop at just Christmas and Easter?
And why should Christians have the monopoly on stealing & re-packaging pagan holidays and forcing them on the rest of us?
I want to lead a campaign to make New Zealand the first country to officially re-introduce the traditional Celtic observance ‘Beltane Day’, in place of the naff Winter Solstice (a.k.a Christmas).
Start circling the 01st May on your calendars.
Here’s a brief synopsis on what Beltane Day is all about so you make your own conclusions as to its merits:
In old Celtic traditions it was a time of unabashed sexuality and promiscuity where marriages of a year and a day could be undertaken but it is rarely observed in that manner in modern times.
In the old Celtic times, young people would spend the entire night in the woods "A-Maying," and then dance around the phallic Maypole the next morning. Older married couples were allowed to remove their wedding rings (and the restrictions they imply)
Before you disparage the idea of Beltane making a come-back 5 centuries after Christians in Scotland & Ireland banned it, here’s a photo from Edinburgh, taken at last years Beltane celebration:
You’ll no doubt observe from this photo and the You-Tube clip below, up in Scotland, Baltane means fire, naked bodies and lashing of beer.
Think ‘Wearable Art’ meets ‘Boobs on Bikes’ with a sprinkling of Marilyn Manson & Guinness.
As it happens, I frequent a far number of other blogs, on a casual basis, taking the appropriate proplactic precautions where necessary.
Initially I was bemused at the frequency of both articles & commentary containing an analogy about Nazi Germany out there in ‘blogger-land’. This bemusement has now turned to annoyance.
These Nazi analogies are especially popular on theist sites.
The subject could be something completely unrelated to Hitler or Germany under National Socialism, but you can bet your boots somewhere in the middle of the thread ‘bang’ a poster will link their position, or that of their target, to Nazi Germany.
From observation, there appears two main corollaries employed when positioning ‘Nazi Germany’ in to a debate:
1.) It is used to critisise & be-little a rivals position, along the lines of “that’s what the Nazis did”.
2.) Utilised to defend a position “we fought against this sort of stuff”.
It appears all heated arguments lead to Germany under Hitler & the posters believe the emotional & objectionable weight of this period is the ultimate condemnation on every subject under the sun.
A debaters ‘trump-card’, when all else fails.
If the Nazi’s favoured something it must be morally repugnant – end of story.
This is evil personified, the marker in the sand from which all other moral & ethical arguments are measured.
Am I the only one who can see the ridiculous & infantile nature, these continual references to Nazi Germany are?
- Hitler had a moustache, so by rights everyone else with a moustache must be a megalomaniac.
- The Nazi’s introduced a ‘Law for the Encouragement of Marriage’ in an effort to get more couples to marry and strengthen the family unit. Should we now counter this by supporting de-facto relationships and denounce marriage & the family as mere Nazi ideology?
- Hitler had a German Shepard dog called Blondie, so it follows all pet-owners are closet fascists and those with that breed of canine are storm-troopers planning secretly for the Fourth Reich. Debbie Harry modeled herself on Eva Braun.
- Nazi doctors were the first to link smoking to ill-health and run campaigns to reduce smoking. We need to disassociate ourselves completely from this terrible era & as soon as a child can walk it’s every parents duty to shove a cigarette their child’s gob and tell them they’ll live to 150.
- Hitler was a vegetarian, and one can see how his diet, lead directly to the Second World War.
- The soft drink Fanta is a product of Nazi Germany, and any child drinking more than two bottles daily over a prolonged period, will develop blue eyes.
- The Nazi' thought God was on their side, so God can't be trusted or he backed a loser.
Can you now see where these farcical 'guilt by association' arguements go?
No where!
Let’s make it our mission to cleanse (pun intended) blog sites of this ‘final pollution’.
This is Korean pastor Moon Hong Min outside court in Christchurch.
He’s looking rather pleased with himself, which is hardly surprising given the fact he escaped conviction after striking his 15 year old niece with a leather belt eight times around her legs, torso, and shoulders.
His guilty plea & the evidence above should have been enough one would have thought, to distinguish the pastors actions from a simple case of over-zealous chastisement, to one involving petulant violence against a minor in his care.
The thrashing came as a result of his niece spending too much time on her cell-phone.
The defence told the judge a conviction would see his work visa cancelled and deprive the Korean Christian community in Christchurch, his attributes as a pastor.
Whilst the judge indicating the crime was of a serious nature, the judge imposed only a fine ($2,5000) & the pastor walked from Court and back to ministering his flock.
Thus, all the smiles above.
Those that are pushing for the referendum on child discipline are asking for consistency in law and clear legal guidelines for parents – well now they have it.
New Zealanders now have the legal precedent & guidelines they were after, and boy will the Christian based anti-smacking campaigners, be applauding this landmark decision.
The message is there for all of us to ponder.
Moons defence was founded on his “character” and his own beliefs of traditional discipline ‘old testament style’, plus the ramifications a conviction would have on his ability to stay in New Zealand.
The Judge agreed these were enough grounds for Pastor Moon to escape conviction, and he receive the lighter punishment.
If he had have been ‘Joe Bloggs the Atheist from over the fence’ or ‘The Head of The Hells Angels chapter’ in court under identical circumstances, it’s doubtful the court would have been so lenient in imposing just a fine.
The decision in this case will be picked-up by lawyers up & down the country and the precedent created here will doubtless be repeated in similar cases.
Pastor Tale Hakeagaiki, a fine upstanding Christian gentleman, has ‘turfed-out’ out a children's theatre group that performs plays featuring witches, little pigs and princesses, from it’s traditional home, a Wellington church hall - all because it’s not a “Christian activity”.
KidzStuff Theatre for Children has been staging productions – such as The Princess and the Pea, The Pied Piper of Hamelin, Three Little Pigs, Puss n’ Boots and Sleeping Beauty – in the Red Brick Hall, part of the Cambridge Terrace Congregational Church, for about nine years and is closely associated with the venue.
But this arrangement is no longer, because those nasty witches and trios of swine, were not in tune with the brand of Christianity practiced by the new Pastor.
“The place is not a community place, it is a church and in my view should be used for Christian activities,"
“I see it as a church hall for the glory of God”
So this years school-holiday production of ‘Which Witch is Which’ was performed somewhere else.
One only has to take a look at the reprobates & degenerates associated with KidzStuff Theatre to see why the good pastor doesn’t want them polluting young minds.
Children have hated these fanciful 'fairy' stories for centuries.
But this story doesn’t end there, after booting Kidzstuff out, the duplicitous Pastor Hakeagaiki ran his own ‘approved’ school-holiday production from the Red Brick Hall.
Numbers were apparently rather ‘thin on the ground’ for this consecrated production.
Wellington kids apparently much prefer their fairy stories with princes, castles and a liberal dose of anthropomorphism, over ones with arc’s, loaves & fish and living-dead.
Atheists do look for answers to existence itself. They just don't make them up. What am I like? Well, imagine Reginald Perrin, only more neurotic & dependent on beer to function normally in public.
