Disney’s worst kept secret is out: Mickey Mouse is Satan

Children I want to warn ya'

Cuz I've been to California

Where Mickey Mouse is a demon

[Aquabats: 'Idiot Box']

Last week we were greeted with the news from a Saudi Sheikh Muhammad Munajid, that the loveable Mickey-Mouse was "one of Satan's soldiers".

He then went further stating “everything he touches impure”.

The cleric, a former diplomat at the Saudi embassy in Washington DC, said that under Sharia, both household mice and their cartoon counterparts must be killed.

Strangely I find myself agreeing with the good Sheikh.

I’ve always had suspicions myself about Mr M. Mouse. May be it was because, he’s always smiling?

Or those oversized shoes? (a thinly veiled Freudian link to the size of his genetalia,if I ever

saw one) Now you’ll see why there’s always a satisfied smirk on Minnies face.

Goofy is another Disney character worthy of dissection, bent as a row of tent pegs if you ask me.

Donald Duck, has to be the poorest example of anthropomorphism going, and should be banned if only for this reason.

Disney officials stated "Walts head is not available for comment"

Yes, it’s about time we ‘righteous ones’ purged our children’s lives of all cartoon characters.

Add to this list of ‘pollutants of young minds’: The Imperialistic Thomas the Tank Engine, Zionist Sesame Street, and don’t get me going on Pooh Beer.

The children of Mohammed (praise be unto him) should not be exposed to such filth.

Our Sons (but obviously not daughters) should be at school, learning how to handle explosives & assemble a Kalashnikov in under 30 seconds, rote learning all 114 chapters of the Qur’an - not laughing & enjoying at cartoons with universal appeal.

All disciples of The One True Prophet (praise be to his name) must be able to find ‘The Great Satan’ on a World Map by the age of five.

Our brother Sheikh Muhammad Munajid has put a line in the Holy desert sands.

"Mickey Mouse has become an awesome character, even though according to Islamic law, Mickey Mouse should be killed in all cases."

But wait!

Rejoice, followers of the one true prophet (praise to God, the only God is God) thanks to our brothers in Palestine we may have found solution to this impasse.

An Islamic version of Mickey has been created for the enjoyment & enlightenment of our children!

Allah’s will is truly strong!