Saturday, February 21, 2009

HOLIDAYS IN THEIST HELL-HOLES: JOIN OUR TEN DAY ARMED TOUR OF BRAZZAVILLE


Today’s Holiday Destination: Brazzaville (Republic of Congo)

Chances you’ll run into a fellow theist on the street: 98%

In 2003, a BBC survey voted Brazzaville as ‘The Worst City in the World to Live’ , beating off stern competition from the likes of Khartoum and Baghdad.

At one stage it was considered ‘The Worlds Most Dangerous City’, but it lost that lofty mantle, to Baghdad, shortly after the invasion.

Brazzaville is now only the second most dangerous city on the planet.

The ‘good oil’ has it, officials in the Brazzaville Tourist board, are going all out to obtain ‘the title’ as most dangerous, with a few random mass-killings of their own (mums the word on this, they don’t want the Jihadists in Iraq to find-out)

After decades of social and political turmoil, hunger, poverty, fighting, coups, rampant corruption, disease etc – the city is for all intents & purposes dysfunctional, but with a high density of Churches.

Let’s therefore look past the unspiritual facts like this, and place Brazzaville in its rightful position amongst The Top 10 Most Theistic places one can visit.

Don’t let all this crime & poverty deter you, there’s a spiritual reverence to Brazzaville, that the mainstream media & travel-agents forget.

For example, in 2007, this is deeply religious country, released of stamps to observe ‘World Religion Day’.
Wearing their hearts on their sleeves they’ve tell the world loudly "God is the source of all religions." - in between the highest rates of recorded rape in the world, and dropping dead at an average age of 35.

Yes folks, Brazzaville is a theists dream destination, with amongst the highest density of God-fearing citizens on this planet & most importantly hardly an evil-atheist to bother you.

It’s time to disregard your Government’s Travel Warning, and make that pilgrimage to D.R Congo – to experience being in such a theistic paradise, amongst so many fellow people ‘of faith’.

It’s time to get away from the moral-perils of your sectarian lifestyle back at home.

Abortion, gay-rights etc will all be things of the past, as you relax for 9 nights (10 days for good behaviour) in Brazzaville.

On our 10 day trip of you’ll travel in air-conditioned comfort in our Tour Bus, mingling with the local citizens.

We’ll eat-out nightly, in one of Congo’s numerous ‘Five Star Restaurants’ , as we discuss theocracy with our brothers in God. This trip is a fully escorted, with local guides.

As a special bonus on, the last two days, we’ve bribed local officials to run seminars for those taking our tour, on how to immigrate to the D.R Congo, and make a better life for you and your family – far from that hedonistic, profane society you rally against.

Children discounts are available.

So don’t delay – last years tour was sold-out (the U.N got in first)



1 comment:

DUG853 said...

Travel brochure style handed out at churches would be great-!