God Texts Fijian Pastor about impending Disaster!

There’s one thing to be said about the ‘Interim Fijian Regime’ (read: Military-Lead Government) – they don’t take fools lightly.

For the last month or so Pastor Laione Lutumaimuri Nacevamaca (above) and his side-kick Bill Govaka (ironically the one time former head of The Fiji Visitors Bureau) have been telling anyone who is interested, that a major natural disaster was about to hit Fiji – specifically 2:30 pm on Wednesday (23rd) this week.

The reason why the time/date is so specific is because it was God that personally told Pastor Nacevamaca, by way of his cell-phone clock.

That’s right: God telepathically communicated with Nacevamaca, then texted him!

“This is the date and time, mark it on your calendar” is what the excitable & delusional Pastor told the local press.

Sadly there were large tracts of the Fijian populous that believed his prophecy, so when whole villages began moving to higher-ground, tourist resorts were cleared following warning emails sent by Govaka, business’s & schools closed to avoid the impending disaster(s) - the Government acted decisively - by arresting & imprisoning the pair on Tuesday for spreading rumours.

Nacevamaca is charged with maliciously fabricating and spreading by way of mouth that there would be a tsunami, earthquake and strong winds, causing public alarm.

Mr Gavoka was charged with spreading the rumours by e-mail about the tsunami and earthquakes and causing public alarm.

Needless to say the time/date passed without either a ripple on land or sea, nor more than a warm sea-breeze.

Whether God bothered to text Nacevamaca to say “sorry for standing you-up” has yet to come-out.

Note: Off-Air for 10 days (may be less - who knows?)