Help the Oingo Boingo Tribe find God and stay out of Hell!

The small Oingo Boingo tribe have occupied the same hidden valley of Papua New Guinea for millennia.

The jungle-tribe remains oblivious to the outside world, just as the outside world remains unaware of their existence.

Given this scenario how does God communicate with the tribe?

Not even the most fervent and adventurous proselytising missionary has come across their village and the tribe are perfectly happy & comfortable with their existence and feel no need to seek out other human contact.

Why is God happy for generation after generation of the Oingo Boingo tribe to burn in hell?

Less than gentle reminder: Christians, Jews and Muslims all share the same God.

Nothing gets your average garden variety Christian and Muslim’s ‘knickers in a knot’ than kindly reminding devotees they revere the same God.

In-fact the ‘Abrahanic threesome’, comprising Jews, Christians and Muslims, all happen to worship the same supreme-being.

Yes indeed ladies & gentlemen, at the core of all three of these monotheist religions is the same God.

Muslims, Jews and Christians may well give this supreme-being differing names, different interpretations, different off-spring who came to earth, customs etc - but the basis of all three religions is the reverence of the same megalomaniac sky-daddy.

Call him Elohim, All Haqq, Yah, Messiah, Allah, Everlasting Father, Jehovah, Al Basir or any other derivation - make no bones about it – this is the same invisible geezer generically called God and theists of all colours need regular reminding of less than palatable fact.

So when the September 11th hijackers praised God as they crashed their planes causing the deaths of 3,000 innocent victims – the God they exalted is the same one worshipped at your local Baptist or Catholic church.

Bin Laden and The Archbishop of Canterbury adulate the same God.

Glenn Beck and The Taliban exalt the same God.

The Pope and wacko Mullah Omar pray to the same supreme-being.

When you put it in this context it’s easy to see they are all bonkers!

Calling-on all Atheists: Let’s stop the baby slaughter!

Between 10 to 50% of all pregnancies end in spontaneous abortion (better known as miscarriages)

God (a,k.a Yahweh and Allah etc) clearly wants these embryos and fetus’s to die.

God therefore arbitrarily slaughters millions of unborn humans every week of the year and does so with some relish.

God is pitiless in his blood lust.

Natural abortions occur at the same rate in the pregnancies of his devout followers and the population of non-believers.

More disturbingly Gods followers see nothing wrong with this mass-murder and still fall to their knees in homage to his megalomania.

I’m calling on all atheists to take a stand against this pathological baby killer by protesting outside your closest church or mosque.

Let’s show these theists we don’t accept their God’s baby-slaughter.

What Evidence would it take for you to believe a Tyrannosaurus was roaming your city?

The media is abuzz with reports of the alleged sighting of a T.Rex roaming the forests on the outskirts of your city.

A family is adamant it was a five metre tall, fearsome giant lizard they saw in a wooded area only 10 kilometres from where you live.

Naturally experts are highly dubious at these claims a large carnivorous dinosaur had somehow survived human detection for the past 60 million years.

The media makes fun of the claims, satirising the passionate claimants reports.

Now imagine how you would react to these anecdotal assertions?

What corroborating evidence would you need for you personally to attest to the notion “a T-Rex is indeed on the loose”?

Pictures? DNA samples? Expert confirmation from biologists? Seeing the beast with your own eyes? A combination of some or all of the above?

Now replace T-Rex in your mind with the word/concept of ‘God’ (as in the popular Abrahamic notion of the term)

As outlandish as the stories of a T-Rex running loose in local forests sound, they pale into insignificance when placed against the idea of a super-powerful all-seeing interventionist 'being' who created all life in the universe, existing undetected, watching & influencing all activities – from the birds in the sky to the deepest ocean – from birth to death and then even into the after-life.

Why is the stringent evidence even a layman needs to corroborate say a modern-day T-Rex, never applied to quantify the far more unbelievable being(s) known as ‘God’?

The 'What is God?' Challenge

I am putting-up NZ$1,000 to anyone who can explain to me, in terms I can understand…

“What is God?”

This is a genuine offer (refer conditions below)

I will keep-posting this offer, so there are no time-restraints or limits on the number of submissions, nor for that matter the entrants location.

I will act as the sole arbitrator – this is for my benefit.

Please do not confuse the question “What is God?” with “Is there a God?”.

For anyone to answer the question “Is there a God?” we first need to establish the definition of ‘God’.

So imagine you are describing a domestic cat to someone who has never encountered one.

Let’s not get bogged-down in platitudes or meandering philosophical abstracts.

Nor do I want-to-get involved in semantics.

A cat has teeth and claws, this we understand ,without breaking-down the teeth and claws into their make-up, functions etc - nor having to require a Biology degree.

Just stick to the basic ‘make-up’ of God.

For example since The Bible tells us believers will enter heaven to be by his side, clearly this means he has sides – right?

But is he a square of a hexagon?

Have I misinterpreted ‘by his side’?

Apparently humans are made in his ‘image’?

So if I bumped into God at the Supermarket, what would I behold? Would his male appendage be obvious?

We are told looks down-on us 24/7, so with all the activity he has to monitor it’s reasonable to think he has a multitude of eyes - a bit like a house-fly?

See what I’m after?

Keep referring back to the child-like domestic cat scenario when answering and you won’t go wrong.

Remembering a cat is more than an animal with fur.

Keep at the back of your mind, I am not one of the 3 billion humans that are 100% sure God exists, and have never to the best of my knowledge meet a God, nor encountered any of his magical powers.

You need to start from square-one with me.

Also peoples, please do not belittle me by calling into question my intelligence or open-mindedness with statements like “You won’t understand”. May be I will, when you use terms any layman will understand.

Further it was a God that saw fit to use words as the sole method to describe his workings in his manifesto. These words ‘of God’ are what believers follow. Not a DVD or You-Tube - a book called 'The Bible'. Therefore if it is good enough for God to use words to convey such crucial information like; man-kinds life-mission, creation, what happens when we die etc - then surely there is scope in the written language to describe this ‘God’? By stating there are no words to describe God you are in-fact bringing into question the writings of The Bible and Gods very existence.

Thank-You.

Paul.


Conditions:

I will donate the money (equivalent of USD 700)to go to a ‘Secular’ Non-Political ‘New Zealand Registered Charity’. Like say Child Cancer or Crippled Children Society etc. All of the winners own choice. Overseas entrants are fine. Those of you from overseas may prefer to opt for an International Charity organisation (without religious or political ties). I will act as the sole arbitrator. No correspondence entered into. Leave your answers in the comments section.The more pedantic in our midst can contact canterburyatheist at gmail.com.